Patient Communication

Let me say the most important thing first: when some elders “take things lightly, have fewer friends, and like to be quiet by themselves,” it doesn’t necessarily mean something is wrong; it might be a healthy shift in mindset. Gerontology calls this “gerotranscendence”: the body slowly declines, but the mind actually becomes calmer and knows more clearly what it wants. This post is an extension of Does an 80-year-old still need to exercise?, written for those of you worrying about why your older family members are getting “more and more indifferent.” ...

Let’s start with the most important point: telling people to exercise rarely works, not because you haven’t said enough, but because you’re talking to the wrong “stage." Psychology research shows that when someone changes a habit (starting to exercise, quitting smoking, or controlling their diet), they go through five stages, and what works at each stage is completely different. Throwing an exercise routine at someone who hasn’t even considered moving is like pitching a loan to someone who isn’t looking to buy a car. It’s bound to fail. ...